I really struggle with comparison.
I don’t know if it’s in my DNA or if it’s a result of the way I was raised, but one thing I know for sure is that I have always, and still do, struggle with comparison.
And only recently have I truly realized just how ugly that can get.
The ladies at my church are currently going through “Comparison Trap” by Sandra Stanley and, let me tell you, it has really opened my eyes to some darker places in my heart.
I’ve learned a lot, but one devotional in particular really stood out for me. In it, Stanley says “Every minute you spend comparing yourself to others is a minute you spend subtly accusing God of short-changing you“.
Think about that: Every time you compare your life to someone else’s life, you are telling God “Hey, You got this wrong. You owe me“.
How stupid are we?
How stupid am I?
Let me tell you, I’ve had some messed up stuff happen to me. I, by no means, have had a perfect life…but I haven’t lived a terrible one either. I’ve been blessed beyond all measure. And just like the Rend Collective song, I’ve been learning to count all of my blessings.
I’ve learned that if God keeps something from me, it was something that would have taken my attention away from Him. Maybe I don’t have that shiny new house or a really popular blog, but what I have is Him. He has blessed me in incredible ways. But He knows my heart more than anyone (the good and the bad).
Is it my dream to become like Beth Moore or Jen Wilkin? Yes. Do I still want to write books and give speeches? Yes. Would I love an opportunity to teach Christians how to navigate political spaces like Russell Moore? Yes.
But my dreams, realized or not, don’t define me. Christ does.
God uniquely crafted my gifts for a specific purpose (a purpose I haven’t fully realized yet, to be honest), and I plan on using every inch of my talents to bring Him glory and to spread the Gospel, but I won’t get to live that out if I waste my time comparing myself to others.
That road leads to sin, not sanctification, and it’s not a road I want to go down anymore.
As Stanley often says, “There is no win in comparison”.
Let’s take that lesson to heart.
Grace & Peace,
Christina
